Saturday, July 1, 2023

Dealing in Fear, Finding Ways to Win, Let's Begin

Dealing in Fear and Finding Ways to Win

A blog post and actual life story about defeating fear with a few small life wins.

How have I battled fear, and stress in my life? Fear isn’t just bad, and I’ll explain this point a little later in this post. As I look back I see how playing sports really helped me fight fear, and stress. Growing up I played sports in grade school, junior high school, high school and college. Grade school, and junior high school were split up, grade school ended at seventh grade, and high school started at eighth grade. In grade school I played little league, in junior high school I ran track, played basketball, wrestled, and played football, in high school I ran cross country, and wrestled, and in college I learned taekwondo, and I fought in a college sponsored event called a poomsae. Staying active is good for your health, and now that I’m older my sports are working, and making a living. While I may not be trying to be the first across the finish line or get a win from the three point line, I do stay active and work towards enjoying my time.

By the time I was twelve both of my parents were gone. My mother passed away from breast cancer, and my father was gone before my fifth birthday. My father may still be alive, I just don't know. I'm certain I went into a type of shock, stress and fear at a fairly young age in life; nevertheless, I had to gather myself, and face my fears, fear of not knowing were I was going to live, fear of not having parents, and fear of my life. Soon after my mother died I became a California ward of the court, and had it not been for family members willing to take me in I would have been sent off to the foster care system. I now look back and see I had some wins as I battled through my early life fears, and stress. A big win for me was having family members who were willing to take me, and if they didn't step in to help I may not be writing this blog post. Finding and getting a win when possible can help defeat fear, and deal with stress. I didn't turn to drugs or alcohol, I turned towards sports, working out, and competition, and yes for me participation was a win. I'm thankful to have been able to get some wins just for being healthy, able to participate, and showing up. I didn't mess with drugs because I watched my mother pass away from breast cancer within a year or so of her cancer prognosis and treatment. During her battle with caner she was hopped up on all kinds of prescribed medication to deal with chemo therapy treatments, and breast removal procedure, and none of it saved her. I didn't see my wins at the time, but developing a healthy fear of drugs was an actual win for me. As I mentioned in the beginning of this post, fear isn't always bad. Fear is a built in survival mechanism, and it kicks us into fight or flight mode when we need it, so fear does serve a purpose, but constant, perpetual, and prolonged conditions of fear are unhealthy. I also think fear, and stress can be dealt with in a natural and organic way. Things like great nutrition, proper rest, and a variety of activities can be helpful with combating fear, and stress. A quick note about weed. I know weed is not for me; nevertheless, I do think weed used for medicinal purposes may be helpful to those who may need it, and a it may also be a useful alternative to prescription drugs or other prescribed medicines. After witnessing my mothers health decline, and eventual death I think an alternative medical treatment with medical weed may have helped her more than prescription drugs did. I personally stay away from weed, and its derivatives, and I do my best to live my life accordingly. A few wins in life, big wins, or small wins over time can help defeat fear and deal with stress, get those wins.

Somehow I made it to college and while in college I really prioritized parties and drinking. I was a functional drunk, social drunk and party drunk from college until my son was born. I was in my early thirties when my son was born so lets call it a good ten years of college, drinking, partying, marriage, and work. I've never been drunk on a job, or at work; however, after work and social events I went full tilt with alcohol. So from college through my early married years till my son came along was a solid ten to twelve years. Long story short, a single event caused me to count my blessings and give up alcohol cold turkey, and I never looked back. I'll save that single event for another post, and I'm thankful to live to tell about it. I most certainly consider giving up alcohol a win. However, I do reserve a special day of thanks when I have a little something, and only if my day is completely clear, no holiday on call, no emergency on call, no work, no nothing, and usually this day of thanks is that kind of day other than that I'm good. At this point in life I'd rather drink an ice cold glass of milk, water, coffee, tea, or a carbonated mineral water, and even an occasional soda, no more alcohol and that's a win for me. To finish this on a winning note, I thank you for reading this far and would like to invite you to bring yourself back to read my future posts and stack those wins.

Dealing in Fear, Finding Ways to Win, Let's Begin

Dealing in Fear and Finding Ways to Win A blog post and actual life ...